The following is the blog post turned script for episode 3 of Mind Overrun.To start, as I alluded to in the first episode, I have a sort of fear of public speaking, good old fashion stage fright. This podcast is an exercise at confronting that fear.
Second, I am to be a father next year. With my wife and I expecting our first. I find myself in an introspective space. A place of vulnerability and potential. And I ask myself the questions I’m sure most first time fathers ask themselves. What will I teach our child? Will I succeed in being a parent and raise an intelligent and thoughtful individual? Will I be a cool Dad?
So with these audio recordings I think about our child growing up and the probability of them becoming curious about what I “do” or what the possibilities are and in a realistic sense if I were to be struck down tomorrow or fifty years from now, at least there’s a small remnant of me left behind. In a way these episodes are for the kid, like lore notes or journal entries in a post apocalyptic video game. Because I know one thing for sure, all of our time is limited on this planet and you never know when your number might be up. There is no such thing as time to waste, nor time to throw away. And these words and the words I share with friends are here for posterity’s sake. For as long as there is a way to store and retrieve it. For the sake of always being able to hear my voice or read my words and feel the love. For however long that may last. Impermanence rules all but the chain of life runs forever.
I hope to continue creating after the initial months of our beloved newborn noob. I know I will lack sleep and have very little free time but as time passes I’m sure I’ll find new ways and adopt a newly evolved process.
Time is the most valuable thing and love is the most precious. And with those two things you can find peace. Whatever I may find myself doing I will do so with the same love and attention. So, sure, not everything ever goes as planned but everything happens anyway and time ticks and our hearts beat the countdown to our final exhale. And as we ride the spiral we still share and relate. We still bond and create. We can still give meaning to everything close to us.
My process is one of play and exploration. One of mining the depths of improvisation and synchronicity in an attempt to capture or at least imitate the magic that is found. Iterations often follow, as a brief change in perspective can open other doors. So try things in different ways. Play but pay attention. And always hold sincere intentions.
To create is to wield the power of the divine. Harness the universal expansion to bring novelty and meaning into existence where there was nothing before. When I paint, or produce music, I feel as if I am part conduit and part conductor. A receiver of consciousness that translates into movement, the coding of life, of experience. Conjuring islands to sprout in the sea of impermanence.
Now that our greatest collaboration is on its way, I can’t help but feel that I now have more confidence in my choices, in my identity, in my power of will. Doubt and mistakes will never go away but my relationship to them has changed. My perspective has been altered. And with it, so too will my creative process adapt and survey new lands.
Check out Mind Overrun on Anchor.fm and Spotify. You can also find it through the Google Podcasts app and in a couple other places. Still working on getting it as wide a release as possible. On the podcast I talk with friends and people I know about interesting topics concerning inspiration, motivation and the occasional weird or funny things that float into our minds. It’s all a work in progress and I hope it finds its audience.